-16

Reportedly Chicagoland hit an all-time low yesterday at -16.  Yes, that is not a typo, I just said -16. And let me tell you--baby, it was cold outside.  There were warnings issued, schools closed, flights canceled, and accidents galore.  Pretty much everyone stayed in.  Garbage collection was suspended, some stores stayed closed and others opened later than usual.  Here's the kicker though--even I stayed home.  I took the dog out for her morning potty time and could not believe how incredibly cold it was.  The word bitter, not even close to describing the cold that hit me full force.  So, I stayed home yesterday.  Even though I needed to make a run to the post office and grocery store, I elected to stay home.  And to keep warm--I cleaned.  Boring.  I know.  But now my house is clean.  I feel better.

However, I did venture out today.  You see it warmed up to -2 by noon, so I thought--what the heck.  I'll go run my errands today and get them over with.  And along the way, I learned a few things.  I thought I'd share them with you, as I discovered them.

1.  Snow tires are God's gift to the Midwest.
2.  -2 doesn't feel all the much different from -16.
3.  However, 0 feels warmer--go figure.
4.  Black ice isn't always black.
5.  Nose hairs do freeze, so does dog pee.
6.  The people who came up with snow boots and down everything are geniuses.
7.  Don't leave coke cans in the garage, they will freeze and burst.  Trust me on this.
8.  I crochet to keep my hands warm.
9.  There are lots of crafters in the Midwest--I didn't say we were good, I just said we craft.
10.  It kind of fun to watch other cars slide--just don't laugh at them.
11.  It's not fun to be in a sliding car, especially with a truck coming at you.
12.  Target is full of a lot of junk.  And I want it.
13.  If you start to fall on the ice--try to roll on your back without putting your hands out.
14.  Don't worry about how you look, everyone is doing it.
15.  Give in to hibernation, it's Gods way for Midwesterners.
16.  Buy some gym equipment, even if you don't use it.
17.  Tell people that you use it.
18.  Listen to music and dance.  Close your blinds if you need to.
19.  Read.  You'll appear to be smarter than you really are.
20.  While out shopping take pictures of books you'd like to read and then download them on to your Kindle when you get home.
21.  Internet shopping--it's almost as fun as the mall.
22.  Buy lots of scarves and gloves--don't worry, you'll use them.
23.  Dust off your recipes--cook and bake.  It's cold outside and it'll heat up your house.
24.  Forget about your hair during the winter.  It's called hat hair and we all have it.  Get over it.
25.  Don't let others ruin your winter.  If you love it, own it.  If not, shut up about it.  Stop your whining!  Spring will be here shortly.  Enjoy the snow, the beauty, and your fireplace.  Wear warm clothing, eat a lot and sing out loud.

The End.