Afterthoughts

It's funny what comes to your mind after.  Those thoughts that you remember thinking.  The ones that at the time were hard to access.  But then later they surface.  Slowly.  Hazy, lazy, foggy impressions--I thought I'd share them.  For it's one thing to experience a weird accident, it's another to analyze it.  And I'm good at that--analyzing, especially my own thoughts.

As I mentioned in my last blog, I passed out on the street in front of a local restaurant almost 3 weeks ago.  I am still in the midst of testing.  From EEG's to EKG's to everything in-between, I will be poked and prodded for several more weeks to come.  Hopefully, these tests will come to nothing.  However, I will succumb to make my doctors and my husband happy.

Anyway, back to those silly thoughts of mine (you see how my mind now wanders) the first of which happened right there on the sidewalk.  When I first began to regain conscienceness I remember a man kneeling beside me.  He was the one taking my pulse, I heard his voice, and felt safe.  He felt under my throat, he felt my wrist and told me that everything was going to be OK.  And guess what I did?  I reached out and grabbed his hand and held on for dear life.  I did not know what was happening, I did not know where I was, I did not understand anything.  All I knew was that this person was taking care of me, and so I held his hand.  And he let me.  He held my hand right back until the EMT's got there.  I'm a little embarrassed now when I think about it.  Holding the hand of a stranger, someone whom I've yet to lay eyes on.  And yet, for me, at the time, it was the right thing to do.  It brought me comfort.  And I'm very grateful for that.

As I was laying there in a pool of blood, I noticed that my head was laying on something soft.  First thought?  I hope it's not my new sweater!  Seriously.  That's what I thought--not my new sweater!  No worries, it was just a few towels brought out by the restaurant to soak up the blood and act as a makeshift pillow for my head.  Secondly, as I was laying there I felt some tugging on my handbag.  I had fallen to the right and my bag was tucked underneath my arm.  I heard a female voice--she was trying to get to my wallet for my ID and guess what I was concerned with?  Don't cut the strap!  Yep, that is what was going through my mind as I lay there semi-conscience.  Don't cut the strap, you will devalue my purse if you cut the strap!  I'm sure there is a lot to be said about a woman who is more worried about her sweater and handbag than she is worried about her own bleeding head--however, we won't go there now, will we?

Once in the ambulance, and once my eyes were finally beginning to open and the pain was settling in, other thoughts began to form.  When I felt the EMT begin to run his fingers through my scalp, I tried to get the words out (but, they would not come) don't let them shave my head!  Again, vain upon vain--I know!  I'm just being honest though.  Would you want a shaved head?  Fortunately for me, the laceration was on my face.  Oh wow, that comes across ever weirder and more vain.  However, they found that it was to the right of my eye, between the eye and the hairline.  No shaving necessary.  Relieved doesn't even begin to describe how I felt at that moment.  My hair was going to be saved!

One thing that I probably should admit right here and now is that I watch a lot of TV.  I love my TV's, (oh I only have 2, big deal) the bigger the better as far as I'm concerned.  Maybe because I've lived most of my adult life with a traveling husband so it became an important part of my evening--to wile away the loneliness.  Maybe.  Sounds good anyway.  So, imagine this, you wake up in an ambulance, lights, and sirens are going and you pull into some type of big bay that looks like an airline hanger.  OK, bear with me here--I had a random thought--what if I'm being kidnapped--like on 24?  Don't laugh, it could happen!  Never mind that I'm a nobody, without money or fame--it could happen!  Ummm, no.  I then realized it was just the ambulance bay.  Boring...

When taken into the ER my mind was finally beginning to clear a little--which made for even more random crazy thoughts.  Yes, my thoughts were many, and they were random.  I think I kind of told the staff what to do and how to do it.  Hopefully not though, maybe I was hallucinating that part.  I can laugh now, I know that I have a very active imagination.  I don't know why all this happened to me, but it did.  So why not make the most of it.  Why not laugh, take selfies, remember the funny crazy thoughts and just get back to thanking God every day for this wonderful awesome life that He has blessed me with.  Why not take some time to reflect on all that could have gone wrong that didn't.  I'm still here aren't I?

I've spent the last couple of weeks recovering from a concussion, and a big ole' black eye, but I'm OK.  I truly believe that when all these many tests come back, they will come back negative--not a thing wrong with me--just a clean bill of health that will be a comforting piece of knowledge to live with for the next 20-30 years of my life.  God is always--good!