I'm a little bit of a Christmas nut. Not intentionally, it just happened. I don't remember many truly awesome Christmases growing up, mostly they were non-events in my home. Most were tied to the up and down financial fluctuations of the real estate market and since my parents were realtors, well, you get it. Christmas followed suit. Some good, some bad.
I think when I grew up and got married a switch flipped and I decided that I would make Christmas an experience to last a lifetime. Decorations everywhere, live freshly cut trees--two if there was room, and homemade baked treats galore. I wanted what I had never had. I wanted to experience an entire month of music, food, decorations, and all the typical entrapments. I wanted memories.
After I got married I worked hard to fulfill the dream. And after our children arrived, well, kaboom!
Christmas was awesome. Our kids would wake up on Christmas morning to a tree overflowing with gifts. I'd budget all year to give them the Christmas I'd never really had. One with thought and effort put into it, one with smells of cinnamon rolls and music in the background. One with Christmas Eve church services, grandparents, and excitement. I wanted it all.
Even now, I'm still that way. 45 years of Christmases done my way. I've loved it. Now with 7 grandchildren, Christmas is exciting again. There was a lull there for a while--just a few years. Our kids grew up and flew the nest, leaving my husband and me to fabricate Christmas pretty much for ourselves which then turned into a season of loneliness. It's hard when you do tons of work to create a feeling, a smell, a time of memory-making only to have your children show up for a few hours on Christmas day. For several years it effected me greatly. Sadness would eventually overtake me and I'd want to forget the whole thing. However, over time I realized that I now had a new reality and had to come up with ways to make it fun and exciting again for just my husband and myself. And I did, for a while. I made it happen.
However, that was shortlived--grandkids came along and fun once again ensued. Christmas became awesome once more, even more so. Grandkids can do that. Make everything awesome. And then again, excitement flooded my heart. Decorating, baking, singing, lights, trees, it's for them now. I hope they don't grow up too soon. I need this. I need them. They make Christmas fun again.
I am patiently waiting right now for my daughter and her family to show up. Ok, not so patiently, waiting. They'll be here tomorrow. Not soon enough. We always have so much fun. Shopping, eating, cooking, meeting up with her siblings, and just doing all things associated with the season. It'll be a week of non-stop fun and craziness. Just how I like it.
Maybe that's what I love so much about Christmas. My family. Just having us all in one city, all coming together to eat, laugh, share stories of the past, open gifts, watch the faces of the littles, music in the background, and joy. Pure joy. For me that is. I hope it is for them too. I hope I'm making memories. I hope that in 20, 30, 40 years from now, they'll all sit around sharing stories and remembering the Christmases they had growing up, of then going to Grandma's house, and that feeling of being so loved and knowing that Grandma would have done anything to make their Christmases the best ever. I hope they know that. That I took it upon myself to create those memories for them.
That's why I love Christmas. It's a time of reflection for me. To remember. And a time to express my love without necessarily using words. A time of giving via action. I hope they see that, feel that, know that. I hope they realize that it isn't really Christmas I love. It's them, all of them. Oh, I realize that I can show them and tell them all year long, and I think I do. However, Christmas--that's a whole new ballgame, that's a game-changer. You don't need excuses to shower them with all things love. You can show them, do for them and spend on them like no other time of the year.
Yep, Christmas for me is awesome. And, I know I overdo it. And, I know I spoil the grandkids. And, I know I'm a little too materialistic about it all. But am I going to change any of that? Nope.
Because these are all the reasons that I love Christmas.
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