I'm thinking that I just might be one of these types of people who learn a little differently or a little more slowly than most. I tend to be a slow processor or a visual learner. Even when God drops something profound into my heart, it takes me a while to assimilate and make it a real part of my learning experience. And then, eventually, I grasp it fully and move on.
It's happening like that now. Slowly and surely adjustments are being made to my life. I'll be honest with you though, sometimes those adjustments hurt. I really don't like them much. However, afterward? Well, afterward I find that in looking back, I wouldn't have it any other way. Those adjustments save me in so many ways. As I was sitting in Bible study the other morning surrounded by friends old and new, God began to speak to me, in his soft, clear, strong voice--He talked while I listened. I really didn't hear much of what was said for the rest of the morning by the other ladies--for I was stuck. Stuck on what He was showing me. We had just read the verse in the Bible about Him being the vine and we are the branches--and then my brain took off. That's kind of how God works with me. He's very patient, kind and loving, He never pushes me, He just waits for me to keep up and learn. I appreciate that.
I think the best way to describe this exercise is to explain it this way. I have a new puppy. She is 6 months old and I've named her Coco Chanel #4. She is a bi-black Shetland Sheepdog. I could tell you the whole long boring story behind her naming but I'll make it short. She's my 4th sheltie and I wanted a Chanel handbag for my 60th birthday--thus the dog and her name. So, as I do with all my new puppies I signed us up for puppy training classes. Puppy 101. It consists mainly of simple commands and socializing said puppy. She's learned to sit, down, stand and come--with heal and stay in the near future--Puppy 102 when she graduates. I'm not kidding. And yes, there will be a 3 and a 4, as I continue to train her for future agility and obedience courses and shows. We're going all the way with this puppy, she's fast and she's smart, and for the most part pretty compliant.
And while it might sound like I am talking about puppy training here, I'm not. Not really. I'm actually talking about the way God trains me. I've been in classes with Him my entire life. From the minute I accepted Him into my heart I've been in training. I've learned to sit, come, down, heel, stand, and just about any other command that He might throw my way. Yes, I've been obedient for the most part--as far as I know. However, along the way, in classes 1-10 maybe not so much. I'm thinking I probably pulled on the lead, lagged behind, raced forward, downed when I should have sat, etc. I think you get the point. And yet, He never once hit me, kicked me, yelled at me or got rid of me. He was patient, kind, understanding, gentle and loved me unconditionally. Yes, once in awhile He jerked up on my choke chain, He might have even given me a stern NO, or two, but never, ever, out of hatred. No, it was always out of love.
And that's kind of how I am with my new puppy. First off, she has managed to worm her way into my heart. And secondly, I am training her out of love. I want her to be obedient, as much for her benefit as mine.
So, back to the branches thing. What God showed me that morning was the importance of me always remembering that He and He alone is the vine. It's when I take that role upon myself that I find I get into trouble. I'm the branch. I need to remember that. It's a very simple analogy. However, one I believe that most of us humans complicate. And I think that that morning God was gently reminding me of my place. At His side, not pulling or lagging. Just right beside Him, my eyes looking up to His face, waiting for my next command.
I watch my little puppy do this at 6 months old. She sits there next to me, looking, waiting, willing, trusting. I wonder--can I do that with my God? That was my real lesson that morning. One of teaching. And no, you're never too old to learn, I am proof of that.
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