Coco Chanel # 4

There's this dog, you see.  And she kinda stole my heart.  I tried so hard not to let it happen.  I thought to myself--I'll just like her a lot.  I will hold her and hug her, feed her and walk her, train her and be good to her, but I won't love her.  Nope.  I am going to keep that love all bottled up for the dog I just lost.  I just couldn't risk hurting that much again.

For that is how much I love my dogs and that is how much I hurt when they die.

So, for me, it was just too risky.  My heart was hurting too badly to take on anything else.  And yet...it happened anyway.  That little bi-black sheltie pup looked into my eyes and said it first.  In her own little doggie puppy way, she said it first.  I love you, mom.

Now, what do I do?  Not love her back?  As she desperately tries to please me?  As she lets me do just about anything to her--nail clipping, tail brushing, bath giving--you know all those mean things that dog moms do?  When she stares at me expectantly waiting for her next command--how can I not love her?

And then it hit me.  She has healed my little broken heart.  She has made me--yes, made me love her. That sneaky little thing.  At just 9 months old and just a mere 6 months after losing my last sheltie, this little girl has made me love her.  She is the cutest, most cuddly little thing.  Always licking, always jumping (hence the agility training) always by my side--she has let me know that in no uncertain terms, she will stick by me and be loyal to me and love me unconditionally.  That's just the way dogs are.

They're sneaky like that.  Those soft, fluffy, snuggly puppies.  They worm their way in and then wind you around their little paws.  How awesome is that?  I didn't even see it coming.

Yes, when God creates you, makes and molds you, and you just happen to be a dog person (I realize some people aren't) I believe that he uses said dogs to teach you (me) life lessons.  Lessons about love, compassion, empathy and even loss.  At least that is how He works many times in my life.  He works through my love of animals, most specifically dogs.

So my new pup Chanel keeps me very busy, we're in training.  She also sits with me when I cry--which I tend to do a lot.  She makes me laugh when I need it the most.  She is the ever loyal friend.  And as long as she'll have me, I'll be her ever loyal mom, loving her way past the end.

You see, I tend to love my dogs forever.  God made me like that.  And it's OK.  It really is.